Being Proud of Who and What You Are

Woman's Reflection on Leading Prayer:

by Yasmin Mogahed

'Given my privilege as a woman, I only degrade Myself by trying to be something I'm not--and in all honesty--don' t want to be: a man. As women, we will never reach true liberation until we stop trying to mimic men, and value the beauty in our own God-given distinctiveness. '

On March 18, 2005 Amina Wadud led the first female-led Jumuah (Friday) prayer. On that day women took a huge step towards being more like men. But, did we come closer to actualizing our God given liberation? I Don’t think so.

What we so often forget is that God has honored the woman by giving her value in relation to God not in relation to men. But as western feminism erases God from the scene, there are no standard left but men. As a result the western feminist is forced to find her value in relation to a man. And in so doing she has accepted a faulty assumption. She has accepted that man is the standard, and thus a woman can never be a full human being until she becomes just like a man-the standard.

When a man cut his hair short, she wanted to cut her hair short. When a man joined the army, she wanted to join the army. She wanted these things for no other reason than because the 'standard' had it. What she didn't recognize was that God dignifies both men and women in their distinctiveness—not their sameness. And on March 18, Muslim women made the very same mistake.

For 1400 years there has been a consensus of the scholars that men are to lead prayer. As a Muslim woman, why does this matter? The one who leads prayer is not spiritually superior in any way. Something is not better just because a man does it. And leading prayer is not better, just because it's leading. Had it been the role of women or had it been more divine, why wouldn't the Prophet have asked Ayesha or Khadija, or Fatima-the greatest women of all time-to lead?
These women were promised heaven-and yet they never lead prayer..

But now for the first time in 1400 years, we look at a man leading prayer and we think, 'That's not fair.' We think so although God has given no special privilege to the one who leads. The imam is no higher in the eyes of God than the one who prays behind.

On the other hand, only a woman can be a mother. And God has given special privilege to a mother. The Prophet taught us that heaven lies at the feet of mothers. But no matter what a man does he can never be a mother. So why is that not unfair?

When asked who is most deserving of our kind treatment? The Prophet replied 'your mother' three times before saying 'your father' only once.

Isn't that sexist? No matter what a man does he will never be able to have the status of a mother.

And yet even when God honors us with something uniquely feminine, we are too busy trying to find our worth in reference to men, to value it-or even notice. We too have accepted men as the standard; so anything uniquely feminine is, by definition, inferior. Being sensitive is an insult, becoming a mother-a degradation.

In the battle between stoic rationality (considered masculine) and self-less compassion (considered feminine), rationality reigns supreme.

As soon as we accept that everything a man has and does is better, all that follows is just a knee jerk reaction: if men have it-we want it too. If men pray in the front rows, we assume this is better, so we want to pray in the front rows too. If men lead prayer, we assume the imam is closer to God, so we want to lead prayer too. Somewhere along the line we've accepted the notion that having a position of worldly leadership is some indication of one's position with God.
A Muslim woman does not need to degrade herself in this way. She has God as a standard. She has God to give her value; she doesn't need a man.

In fact, in our crusade to follow men, we, as women, never even stopped to examine the possibility that what we have is better for us. In some cases we even gave up what was higher only to be like men.

Fifty years ago, society told us that men were superior because they left the home to work in factories. We were mothers. And yet, we were told that it was women's liberation to abandon the raising of another human being in order to work on a machine. We accepted that working in a factory was superior to raising the Foundation of society -just because a man did it.
Then after working, we were expected to be superhuman-the perfect mother, the perfect wife, the perfect homemaker -and have the perfect career. And while there is nothing wrong, by definition, with a woman having a career, we soon came to realize what we had sacrificed by blindly mimicking men. We watched as our children became strangers and soon recognized the privilege we'd given up.

And so only now-given the choice-women in the West are choosing to stay home to raise their children. According to the United States Department of Agriculture, only 31 percent of mothers with babies, and 18 percent of mothers with two or more children, are working full-time. And of those working mothers, a survey conducted by Parenting Magazine in 2000, found that 93% of them say they would rather be home with their kids, but are compelled to work due to 'financial obligations' . These 'obligations' are imposed on women by the gender sameness of the modern West, and removed from women by the gender distinctiveness of Islam.

It took women in the West almost a century of experimentation to realize a privilege given to Muslim women 1400 years ago.

Given my privilege as a woman, I only degrade myself by trying to be something I'm not--and in all honesty--don' t want to be: a man. As women, we will never reach true liberation until we stop trying to mimic men, and value the beauty in our own God-given distinctiveness.

If given a choice between stoic justice and compassion, I choose compassion. And if given a choice between worldly leadership and heaven at my feet - I choose Heaven.

You Can Be Anything You Want

On the death of Ed Bradley...

"Born June 22, 1941, Bradley grew up in a tough section of Philadelphia, where he once recalled that his parents worked 20-hour days at two jobs apiece. "I was told, `You can be anything you want, kid,'" he once told an interviewer. "When you hear that often enough, you believe it."

The above quote serves as support for the importance of having high expectations for children and young people. Youth development research tells us that adults who have high expectations for their kids, and support them accordingly, play a major role in nurturing resiliency in young people, particularly those that grow up in at-risk environments. Resilient youth are those that are able to succeed where so many others fail; who can pick themselves up when they are knocked down and who are less likely to fall victim to the lures of vice and unhealthy lifestyles. Resilient youth do not denigrate themselves because they know their own self-worth; they believe in the words of the adults that nurtured them and taught them that they can be something. To teach someone that they can be something implies that they already are something. Thus, if we teach our children how honored they are to be in the human family, how special a gift their life is, that Allah himself created them as the pinnacle of His magnificent creation and His khalifah, and raise and support them according to this mindset, they will believe it and expect of themselves excellence in life.

Teaching young people to follow their bliss means encouraging them to pursue that inner drive and direction about which the Prophet (SAW) said: "Act, for each of you will find easy that for which he was created" (Muslim). Don't deny young people this divine gift by forcing them to be something that they are not inclined to. Surrender to the God-given fitra that lies within and nurture young people to actualize themselves according to their divinely-created nature. Then, support them and guide them along this path of theirs and help them to learn about themselves along the way. Education, in the end, is ultimately about knowing oneself and "He who knows himself, knows his Lord." So let's practice youth development by encouraging and supporting our young people along the path of self-discovery, self-realization and self-actualization.

Muslim Youth Entrepreneurs

Terrific idea and effort by youth....

Muslim Free Blood for Non-Muslims

By Ahmed Soliman, IOL Correspondent
The website has built up a worldwide database of more than 15,000 donors. A brainchild of four technology-savvy young Saudis following the teachings of their faith, an online blood bank is assisting thousands of people, Muslims and non-Muslims in desperate need of blood donations."The website is serving Muslims and non-Muslims alike," Khalaf Al-Goudi, one of the founders of the http://www.freeblood.com/, told IslamOnline.net." It is quite often that a Muslim donates to a non-Muslim through our site," he added. The website was established four years ago by Goudi, his cousin and two friends as a unique electronic blood bank that offers services to patients who need blood donations from around the world. It has built up a worldwide database of more than 15,000 donors. A person can visit the website and register as a blood donor or a patient who needs blood donations, providing information about city and country of residence, exact address, phone numbers and blood type. The data are made available to those who badly need blood, hospitals as well as local and international blood banks. The website clearly states that donors should not expect to be financially compensated for their donations. "It is totally non-profit," says Goudi. "The goal is to follow Islam's teachings of solidarity and helping others in need. "Efficient - The founders say their project offers an easy, accessible venue for donors and patients."It is more of a fast donor-patient link," says Goudi. The four young Saudis were inspired by a situation they had experienced four years ago. "There was this patient me and my cousin knew who needed a donation from a very rare blood type," Goudi recalls. "When we went to the hospital's blood bank to ask for donors who can help him, they handed us this huge, tattered donors' record book. "We were supposed to search it for donors who can help the patient. "The idea for the online blood bank was born only days after this experience. "Six months later, the website was launched. "Goudi says he and the other founders were convinced that record books and paper archives can not be efficient in the age of computers and internet. "A website would be much easier to access for both donors and patients, especially those who desperately need a life-saving blood donation," he maintains." All what it takes is one click and you have a list of donors who can help you out."

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